The Disappearance of the Pacifier

It has happened. The moment that I have been dreading since the realization that my daughter has an addiction; to her "sou-sou", otherwise known as the pacifier. The time had to come and for most, it comes much earlier than for us. But somehow my daughter became attached to her sou-sou and when I say attached, I mean attached. If you have been a loyal follower of this blog, you know right away what I am referring to. If you are new to this blog, take a moment thereafter to scroll through our history and you will soon realize that the infamous sou-sou is in pretty much every single picture.

We have been taking baby steps to eliminate the need for her pacifier. Everything from the midnight visits of the "Sou-Sou Fairy" who comes to take one of her pacifiers for a newborn baby to down right threats that evil Mom and Dad will throw them away should we see one in her mouth during the day. No matter the situation, Masyn will find happily find a way to find one of her many hidden treasures to taunt the world with. And, I repeat many sou-sou treasures. At one point, Masyn had 7 of the suckers (pardon the pun), and could often be seen walking around with at least two of those in her mouth and one in each hand. Over time, some of these treasures have been lovingly worn out, resulting in the arrival of the "Sou-Sou Fairy", who will come, take them and then fix them for a newborn baby. However, Masyn has wizened up to this charade and refuses to let her last 2 sou-sous out of her sight. That is, until now.

Last night was a long night for the two of us as Masyn dealt with the reality that her two most prized possessions have been lost within our house. After hours of searching and many tears later, we accepted defeat and attempted to go to bed without. We have survived the night and so far nap today, but my little girl is clearly devastated and is heading towards the next stage of grief: anger. Just before nap time today, she tearfully asked for her beloved sou-sou only to lash out in verbal anger that the "Sou-Sou Fairy" was bad because she took her sou-sou. She then went on to heart breakingly tell me that she too was a baby and needed her sou-sou.

And, while many often remind us that she is indeed 2 1/2 years old and much too old for a pacifier, it is breaking my heart to see her so sad and broken up. While she will likely get over this within the next couple of days, I am not sure if this Mommy will. You see, I am caught straddling the fence. The one part of me prays that I am the one to find the two missing pacifiers in the house before her, thus discreetly disposing of them and helping her along her journey of addiction recovery. Yet the other part of me is secretly devastated because I am the one that has to come to terms that my baby is no longer a baby, but a sweet and precious little girl. I am the one not ready for my baby to give up the little baby like things.