Thursday, June 15, 2006

Rain, rain go away .... ewh ... Worm!

I have a sincere squeamish, get that lump in your throat like you could toss your cookies at any moment when I happen to come upon a worm. The feeling is so filled with dread that I literally start to panic and look for ways that I can make a quick exit. All of a sudden, this tiny 2 inch skinny worm appears to be at least 6 feet in length and just as wide. And ... I could swear upon many an occasion that those damn little buggers start to smile when they see my approach.

In an attempt last weekend to be a big girl and role model for my son, I bravely went where no man has gone before and dug holes in the flower beds specifically to find worms. I figured that boys and worms go hand in hand and that I should let Kaelen have his first experience with these appallingly slimy creatures. Kaelen showed slight interest but to my immense relief, did not attempt to pick one up and eat it.

HOWEVER ... Only yesterday, Cathy, Kaelen's dayhome mommy took the kids outside and taught them the fine art of flinging worms. It all started as a couple of the stupid fat things got stuck on the driveway and some of the kids thought that the worm was dying. So, Cathy picked the senseless creature up and threw him into a pile of dirt. Needless to say, Kaelen thought that this was a great game. Cathy had mentioned it to me when I picked Kaelen up from daycare last night and silently in my head I was making a mental note to make sure that we never come across a worm just in case.

WELL ... In accordance to this monsoon like down pour overnight, these little wormies are getting flooded out of their little homes and are literally floating down the river of water on our walkways, sidewalks and roads. As we are rushing out of the door this morning, Mommy trying to juggle holding an umbrella, bags, purse and lock the door, Kaelen runs into the downpour and starts screaming. Not sure what has gotten him so excited I turn around only to narrowly miss being hit bulls eye in the forehead with my biggest nightmare: a slimy worm!! Mommy screams, gets absurdly mad as I have just seen my death and Kaelen is killing himself laughing because he thinks that it is a game. At this point, I am positive that I am going to start crying because my son is torturing me with worms, I am getting soaked and still have 50 feet to get to the van with worms peppered everywhere. I literally can not take a step without stepping on one. Sucking it up like a big girl, I scoop up Kaelen and run like hellfire to the van, holding my breath the entire way and doing a little running man in spot while opening the van door (this is just to be sure no worms can start crawling up my leg). Kaelen gets tossed into the van, lands on his knees and Mommy dives rolls in behind him and tries to catch her breath.

Thank god at that moment the garbage truck came rolling by to distract my very unhappy son. For a moment I had a pained regret for over reacting the way that I did and felt a little guilty in how I had handled getting Kaelen in the van; after all, it is only just a worm. However as I went to shut the van door, I saw the numerous slimy little buggers starring up at me just waiting for the opportunity to torture me again with relish and I realize that I can still hold my head up high and I had won the battle for the day.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

And you think my fear of spiders is irrational???

I have these horrifying memories as a child of my big sister coming to my rescue to squash the monster spider with a shoe (no joke - they were HUGE!) only to have my gratefulness thrown aside when she chased me around the house with the shoe (scary spider still twitching on the bottom no less)!

Just wait until the next storm my lovely sister - revenge is sweet....hahahahahahaha!

Goofball said...

hi hi I think worms can be very funny. They tickle very much when they are moving on your hand!!!

Can I come and have a big worm throwing contest with Kaelen???

funny though that that many worms are in your neighbourhood. When it rains in Belgium you don't step on them all the time!